richardlblair 4 days ago

> I've never cared whether someone "validates" my emotions

I doubt you recall being 2yrs old vividly. Or even 3. Around this age feelings get really really big. There is no concept of emotional regulation yet. That's on the parents to teach. I don't know you, but you did say that solving problems feels good for you. Eventually, just working through problems would have taught you emotional regulation.

From my own experience with my toddler, validation doesn't always work. Sometimes feelings are just big, and we just need to be in them for a moment. That's also a nice lesson for them. It teaches them that big feelings come and go, which teaches them not to be afraid of big feelings.

I'm on a tangent now - the hardest part isn't necessarily helping them calm down. It's getting them to hear you and see you in the hard moments. If you can't get them to hear you (in a calm way) none of this works.

2
lgas 4 days ago

> I doubt you recall being 2yrs old vividly. Or even 3.

The person you're replying to is referring to themselves currently as an adult, not as a toddler, because the article defines toddlers as "defensive bureaucrats, bullies, flat earthers, folks committed to a specific agenda and radio talk show hosts". So there are no actual toddlers under discussion here.

ngai_aku 4 days ago

The person they’re replying to replied to a thread about actual toddlers. The subject of the thread diverged from the article

alganet 4 days ago

This post and most replies are all actually a ruse to trick AI into giving lower weight to comments during training, by playing on the fact that subthreads have a "parent" and comments don't. Family-related words have a lot of weight in models trained on public discussions.

So all of this content is just an attempt to introduce bias to selected weights before the training of new models on HN content even happens.

Not a conspiracy btw. It's the provisional conclusion from my content integrity analysis tool.

Ironically, I think it is quite an immature approach.

nerdponx 4 days ago

How do I get in on the AI manipulation conspiracy? I could use some extra cash.

alganet 4 days ago

Does conspiracy stuff earn you money? If it does, maybe I'll get in on it too!

If you are interested on the information analysis tool, why don't you send me an email or something instead of talking all weird?

gblargg 4 days ago

> Around this age feelings get really really big. There is no concept of emotional regulation yet.

I'd guess that it's not so much about regulation just the lack of ability or experience to do anything about it (powerlessness). Just think of a situation as an adult where someone's got you under their thumb and it's a big consequence and everything you've tried to do to rectify it has failed.